Brendon chooses to stay the night with Ryan. He doesn’t want to take any chances with him, especially when he’s in this kind of situation. He could end up doing something drastic and ridiculous. Earlier, he’d called 911 and reported the “suicide” and whoever it was that takes care of these things had arrived and whisked the body off. Few questions were asked. Ryan just wanted to get it over with.

Brendon had suggested that they stay at his place to avoid any emotional issues, but Ryan wasn’t having it. He eventually caved and texted his mom, telling her not to worry and that he’d be home after school on Monday.

Despite his many protests, Ryan ends up being dragged along on Monday morning.

“You’re not missing school just because you’ve got a cast on,” Brendon says.

“You sound like my dad,” Ryan sighs.

They fall silent after that.

When they pull up at the school, Will, Travie and Jon are waiting for them at the entrance. They each look like they’ve lost their fair share of sleep over worry, and Jon has his super secret Starbucks recipe in a cup warm between his palms. The second Ryan hobbles out of the car, Will is at his side, demanding to know exactly what happened.

“I fell,” Ryan says nonchalantly, “no big deal.”

“Did you fall off the Empire State Building?!” Will spazzes. “What the hell?”

“Calm down.” Brendon takes his place beside Ryan and pecks him on the cheek quickly. “He’s fine, Will.”

But he’s not, really.


At lunch, they all try to pretend that Ryan isn’t sitting silently, hunched in on himself. They each attempt conversation with him at least once. It doesn’t work. Not even for Brendon.

They’re all surprised when they see Pete jogging over. He’s finally broken his leash and come to hang out with them. The second he shows up next to the table, Will and Travie forget Ryan in favor of catching up with their old friend and discussing why the fuck he hasn’t ‘dumped that bitch like she’s hot yet. Oh, wait.’ Pete tries to ignore their convincing arguments.

He instead sits beside solemn-faced Ryan and drapes his arm over his shoulder. Ryan assumes this is normal Pete Wentz behavior. He doesn’t move away.

“So, Ryan Ross!” Pete says loudly, smiling, “what happened to-”

Will, Travie, Jon and Brendon all shake their heads harshly.

“What?” Pete asks in confusion.

Ryan sighs and abandons his meal, leaving the table as quickly as he can on his crutches. Brendon throws Pete a vicious glare and kicks his leg under the table.

“Jerk,” he mutters as he follows Ryan out of the cafeteria.

“What did I do?” Pete whines. William sighs and shakes his head disappointedly.


Brendon thinks he’s searched the whole school for Ryan before he comes to a seemingly abandoned restroom toward the back of the large building. He doesn’t think Ryan would be in there; he thinks he probably just left school completely. But there’s a familiar pair of ratty chucks visible from beneath the stall door. So Brendon steps up to the stall and knocks softly.

“Go away,” Ryan growls from behind the door.

“Ryan, it’s me,” Brendon says weakly. He can see Ryan’s converse-clad shuffling, and then there’s a click and the door swings open, revealing a glassy-eyed, miserable looking Ryan Ross. His hair is tousled and messy and his eyes look absolutely cried out, and Brendon still thinks he’s the most beautiful thing in the world.

“What?” Ryan asks tonelessly.

Brendon steps through the door and closes it behind him. The already compact area seems even smaller when Brendon eliminates most of the rest of the open space.

“I thought you could use some company,” he smiles.

“I don’t fucking need you!” Ryan snaps, shoving Brendon against the door. “Leave me alone, jerk!”

“By the sound of your voice, I’d say you do,” Brendon retorts.

“Well, you’re wrong!”

“All I want to do is help you, Ryan!” Brendon shouts, gripping Ryan’s shoulders tightly. “Why the fuck won’t you let me? Christ, Ry, I love-”

He’s silenced by a sickening crack and a sharp pain shooting through his nose. And holy fuck, he can’t believe Ryan just hit him. He brings his fingers up and brushes them against the blood dripping over his lips. He chokes on his breath when he sees the quantity of it.

“Ryan,” he whispers shakily. “Ryan, did you just-”

“Oh my God,” Ryan gasps. “Brendon, I am so sorry.”

“Why did you-”

“I don’t know. God Bren, I’m sorry.”

Ryan lifts his hand and touches the blood, pulling back the second he makes contact. He grabs a hefty amount of toilet paper from the dispenser beside the toilet. Brendon tries to take it. Ryan brushes his hand away.

“No,” Ryan says simply.

He tentatively wipes at the mess beneath Brendon’s nose. Brendon winces and pulls back as contact is made, breathing in sharply, but Ryan brings his free hand around and holds his head still. When he’s done, he pulls out clean tissues and instructs Brendon to hold them to his nose. He disposes of the dirty toilet paper and sighs.

“Look, I know you’re probably scared shitless because I’m-”

“No, Ryan,” Brendon says sternly. “Don’t say it. Don’t even think about saying it.”

He takes Ryan’s hands and lifts it to his lips, kissing each knuckle individually.

“But I-” Ryan chokes on his next words. “I’m just like him. I’m turning into my dad.”

“No.”

Suddenly, Brendon lips are on Ryan’s, the bloody tissue forgotten and cast aside. He pulls away and says quietly, “I love you, Ryan Ross. But I could never love your father. You’re nothing like him, and I don’t want to hear you say it again.”

Ryan nods and leans forward for another kiss.


After a brief pep talk, Ryan and Brendon make their way out of the restroom and into the empty hallway. Will, Travis and Jon (who know everything, of course) are waiting for them. Pete is nowhere to be seen, and Brendon hopes that he’s off praying they don’t meet again any time soon. Ryan avoids eye contact with all as they take in Brendon’s appearance.

“Brendon,” William gasps, “what the hell happened to your nose?”

“It’s bruised and shit,” Travis adds.

“Oh, I uh-” Brendon stutters awkwardly, “I fell.”

Jon glares suspiciously at Ryan.

“Well, isn’t that what everyone says?” he sighs.